Thanksgiving; Giving Thanks

Heart Songs, Note 25:  Thanks Giving, Giving Thanks, 2010

So very much for which to be grateful…  Grateful that you are my friend and that I am alive and well and have desire to connect with you at this moment in my/your life.  May this find you alive and well and happy to be alive and well and grateful.

In this moment I am wondering, what is the color of gratitude, of gratefulness, of Thanks Giving and Giving Thanks.  Somehow me thinks it is far too rich to be confined to one color alone, so this note will have within all the colors of the rainbow, starting with the ruby red of a long-stemmed rose I was given last night.

This time last November, my daughter Laurel had just flown over from Hawaii to be with me, snow was deep in Flagstaff, and in Sedona, my house had just been gutted by fire, my physical history erased in a matter of hours.  My daughter and I spent our days digging through charred left-overs, choking on toxic fumes; at a night in the privacy and comfort of a friend’s loaned house, we chatted like best friends.  We feasted, resting our frayed nerves, at a meal donated to us by the Heartline Café, which had been burned out about a year previous and understood the depths of disorientation to which such can take one.

Somehow, even from the very first moments, when I arrived home from playing a concert about the birth of Christ to find my house and belongings gone to the hunger of fire, I knew that something magnificent had just been gifted to me.  What I could not know.  I knew I was safe and I knew I was totally taken care of – the how’s of this truth were irrelevant to my deeper understanding of OK-ness.  Even then, I felt a deep gratitude:  I was alive; I had my viola!  The Sedona Community Center gifted me a phone within the hour – I had no phone numbers, but I did have communication, miracle of miracles.  Clothes (and scissors and paper and water and scotch tape and paper towels, you name it) began arriving the next morning.  People slipped me cash at the grocery store.  Within 48 hours a local not-for-profit, Cornucopia, had set up a bank account in my name so that people who had whereof to donate had a place to send it and get a tax-deduction.  By the hour and day, my community got bigger and bigger – people I knew personally, and many that I did not, all there with helping hands and hearts.  I was whelmed with the love coming out of the woodwork towards me.  To this day, I dress daily in love as most of the clothes I own are gifts from friends – and from strangers who heard the story.

The anniversary of the fire passed a few days ago, with attention, but without melodrama.  I was amazed and delighted to find that I simply had no ‘regret’ – to the contrary, joy.   Acceptance of what is, is such a miracle.  I planted seeds the day before the anniversary on the full moon.  My land is happy.  Friends come by to help me weed and clean and share Presence.

I have decided to build:  a passive solar adobe home.  My builder is building this house without a profit to himself – because he wants to.  I am so grateful.  I’ve been dreaming of living in a circle with a crown chakra for years – the master bedroom will be exactly that!

I came back to Arizona from my several months of journeying still unclear what would be next for me.  I played a concert with the Flagstaff Symphony – to which I have belonged for 15 seasons, this being the 16th!  The English horn player who sits behind me and had fallen in love with a sweater crafted of hexagons that my adoptive daughter had made for me some 20 years previous – gifted me with a look-alike sweater she had created over the summer!  Thank you dear sister.

Within days of being back in Arizona, I knew that I would rather live here than anywhere else:  my car battery had died over the summer, and I knew exactly where to go to replace it!

Seriously:  the light here, like the Light in Jerusalem, is a direct connect with eternity.  The air is dry and clean.  The red carved sandstone rocks of Sedona are a daily changing tapestry of art extraordinaire.   Oh, and the sound of water, the magic of the sound of running water in the desert, and a rock-sit friend with which to share it.  Yes, long-term friends make a difference – a big difference — to one’s sense of belonging, when everything else in one’s life has morphed.

My enormity of gratitude has simply grown and grown over the sometimes long months of this past year.   Yes, I had moments of severe doubt – but only moments.  I believe these moments were a part of the necessary emptying.

The deepest gratitude has been in the witnessing of how I am simply different as a result of the scouring of the fire.  I like this new me better, and she sure is a whole lot easier to live with!  Fear that I have carried and worn all my life is simply gone.  How wondrous and miraculous!  My mind is empty most of the time – that is, empty of needless thought – and appreciative of the tiniest details of this moment.  Rumination, judgment, longing, are all gone, gone, gone…. Gate, Gate, Para Gate, Para Sam Gate, Bhodi swaha.  Some folks meditate for years to obtain what a simple house fire accomplished for me in two ½ hours.  How cool is that!

I was born with a very keen and intelligent mind.   I’m imagining I am still very bright (in fact my Light has increased logarithmically!).  The sweet thing (and it truly feels very SWEET) is that my head is often simply at Peace, my heart open and full (for no ‘reason’).   Period.   I am much more Present to Now; stories of then and when have little allure – hell-of-a-place from which to design and create a house for my future!   What’s that?

So, when I ‘remember the fire’, as I did last week on November 21, it is in a Now that I am witnessing the who of me — currently homeless, a year later, full with all the details needing to be handled — how deeply tranquil I feel, and how quietly joyous I am.  I am so grateful for this.

I truly wish this state were something I could package and give away to the rest of the world.  I do feel that in Being it, in Being the Love I am/we are deep down in my/our souls, we do bit by bit transform the world around us.  We are the Change for which we have been waiting.

And, Yes, it is enormously disorienting at almost 70 to have no home, no desk on which to order my life (or not!), not even a regular place to sleep…  And, YES!, so what!

I have so much, much, much more inwardly than I ever had before, and so much, much, much more than most of the population of this precious planet will ever have – what on earth could I concoct for my mind to worry about?   Sure, I’m scraping to gather enough funds together to do what I need to do . . .  I could worry about that, but frankly, why bother?

And anyways, how many of us get the opportunity of having to start over from scratch, just when we thought we were settling into our ‘golden years’.  Great wake-up call!  In fact, my life feels so golden, even in this current homeless itinerant state, that I do anticipate meeting the love of my life just about any day now – it could even be tomorrow, Thanksgiving Day.  Thanksgiving is such a wonderful day.  Thanksgiving is close to my heart.   My one daughter and her daughter were each born on a Thanksgiving day, and my old dog Niawen, now totally mindless in her puppy Alzheimers, and my little dog Mojud were also born on a Thanksgiving day…

Yes, Thanks Giving, what a wonderful day on which to meet one’s Beloved!   And, as I said, since every day is for me a day of great Thanks Giving and Giving Thanks – it really could be just about any day now that he, my Beloved, and I shall meet.  And, should you happen to know him – please, pretty please with butter and honey on it, do introduce us!  We will both be ever grateful to you.

My little RV that was home for so many months, despite an electric cord extended over by my neighbor, has failed me in comfort now that the night-time temperatures have dropped down to freezing.  The grace,…  I have been offered two house-sits since I returned in late October and am very open to more coming my way – in fact, one for a few days in January just arrived in an email.  Thank you my brother, you know who you are.           For this moment, grateful, I sit in a friend’s warm home in West Sedona, at a desk, with an overhead light, and a chair just the right height to type easily at my computer.  Details.  In gratitude, I appreciate details upon details, details building moments, moments warping into hours, and then these hours growing into days and weeks of – yes, more gratitude.

There is so very much to be thankful for, and for which to be grateful.  I am grateful to hold you in my heart, just you, for this moment of sending.  May love fill your being abundantly.  Happy Thanks Giving, Giving Thanks to you.

Much love to you, my friend, my sister, my brother, and to you too, my Beloved, in gratitude I am, 🙂 Marianna

My contact information remains the same:

Email:  well – at – hartsong – dot – net

Phone: 928-300-3963

Postal mailing address: PO Box 4394, Sedona, AZ, 86340.

Thank you for being a part of my life.   I look forward to hearing from you, to seeing and being with you.  Bless your heart.

 

 

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Laser of the Heart

Heart Songs, Note 24: Laser of the Heart

What would happen if…  we used the litmus paper at the center of our being, at the heart of our being, the heart of our soul, as our Geiger counter, inner radar, and navigational tool?  What if we consistently dared to follow the Divine urgings of our soul in all our actions in the world and in all our interactions with others?

We do this anyways, most of us, but we do it unconsciously.  And unconsciously it is our knee-jerk personality programs that most of us dial into.  Most of us as we run on automatic, myself included, react to whatever we perceive as being outside of ourselves, usually in some form of judgment, and then that focus on whatever it is outside becomes our reality.   We externalize the information we receive rather than using it to amplify our own light, heart and vibration.

What if we used the litmus paper of our soul’s heart center as a way to remind ourselves of who we are, so that when we perceive something that is in some manner in disharmony with that center of who we know ourselves to Be, that we use that information to fine-tune, upgrade, and turn up the flame of our own heart in compassionate understanding of whatever the outside stimulus was. Whatever happens ‘out there’, whether it is a stranger cutting in front of you on the road, someone you know saying something nasty to or about you… your house burning down, it’s really all the same:  all can be used as a prompt or cue to remember who we are – deep inside.  This does not mean that our perceptions may not be accurate.  However, to simply ride the wave of our perception into judgment, rather than using it as a reminder to come home to our center and upgrade our attunement, is a misuse of the gift of that perception.

I have just spent seven very interesting and very sacred weeks at the I.D.E.A.L. community just outside of Jaffary, B.C. (www.idealsociety.org).   I have had many reminders – mostly self-generated.

I.D.E.A.L. is a very brave and remarkable experiment in intentional communal living, a gathering together of over eight different nationalities — more if you include visitors — of 65 permanent residents ranging in age from a few months to 70+ years old.  French is the communal spoken language.  However, all these different languages, French, English, German, Russian, Spanish, Italian, Portuguese, Dutch, and while I was there Greek as well, are heard in daily readings.  The daily practice while these readings are happening is to attune to all the peoples of the world who speak these languages.  Song, through the sacred music of Beinsa Douno (and dancing the PanEuRhythmy) is the vibrational language and attunement of this community.  Singing accapela, with up to 7 different voice parts, in the Bulgarian language, which is one of the world’s primal attuned languages, is a daily practice.  Recorded classical music masters are broadcast daily; while live concerts happen one or more times a week.

Their spiritual framework is handed down to them by their Master:  Omraam Mikaiel  Aivanov, who was a disciple of Beinsa Douno.  Natacha Kolesar, Russian-born, a very intelligent woman of broad vision and huge heart is their current leader.  The over-all attunement of this community is far clearer than in the world at large.  And, although they have not yet evolved into Living the Golden Age on Earth, they do have a clear commitment to Heart which is very beautiful.

I was gifted seven weeks of ‘recovery’ time.  During my time at IDEAL I experienced Deep Rest for the first time since my house fire last November.  My burnt adrenals began their healing journey.  I routinely slept long hours, and included a one-to two hour daily time of deep silent meditation.   I also got to practice my viola on a regular basis – my one pure and constant link with my previous, pre-fire incarnation.  This in itself was healing for me.   I was served three vegetarian meals at day – except for their Fasting day, Thursday noon to Friday noon.

I was given immense Space to simply be Marianna and follow my own internal rhythms.  These rhythms took different forms as the weeks progressed.  What a privilege.  Thank You IDEAL!

My little RV with its solar hat served as my sacred and independent living space – until the clouds and the cold arrived in September, when I needed to plug in to their electricity and borrow a heater for the cold nights.

One of the visual pleasures of living in this community was that men and women alike dressed by the colors of the day:  gold for Sunday, Purple for Monday, Green for Friday,…  It is amazing to flow through ones day with all the various shades and textures of the day’s color (and often it’s opposite) reflected all around you through your own and others’ clothing color choices.  White, which reflects all the colors of the rainbow, was the default color of choice.

I was privileged to be included in their daily singing, and played in three concerts while I was there.   I played in a classical chamber concert for the first time in many years:  Mozart Violin duo, Beethoven serenade for flute, violin and viola, and the Nocturne from Borodin’s 2nd string quartet.  I accompanied Ashok Kumar by ear on three Indian songs he sang.  And I played with the Vera Chorus the last night I was there.

Whenever you gather that many people together they will naturally be at different stages in their own personal development – just as it is anywhere. My personal litmus paper was not as clearly differentiated on my arrival as by my departure.    I almost left during my first week. Now you need to know that I arrived there with the goal of creating this community as my new home.  I am a dual citizen (Us/Canadian) so re-turning home to Canada is a no-brainer, so I thought.  Whenever you are attached to any outcome, unless you are living in a unified field of consciousness, its opposite will make its presence felt immediately.  What I experienced (sensed, picked up) my first week was a sense of the deep individual loneliness, hurt, fear, pain, and discontent of individual members.  I realized later that it is the least evolved members in any community that will be the squeakiest wheels.  These very visible ones, amplified in me my own sense of separation and not-belonging.  I became, in me, the separateness I was feeling around me.  [Our unconscious patterns, aspects of our soul history we have not been yet able to bring into consciousness, will attract these opposites to ourselves anywhere any time to help us to wake up]  That first reactive week was my loneliest week there.  During that week I got sick with a urinary tract infection – that for many weeks, despite treatment, simply would not go away…  until I finally got to the root cause, in me, and let go.

While I was there, as a part of my discernment process I chose to re-read the Autobiography of a Yogi by Paramahansa Yogananda – available for free on Kindle I discovered!

By the last week, much as my mind had been attached to a different outcome, I was very clear that at least at the present time, I was not to stop here and make this community my home.  With this clarity a very interesting thing happened.  I simply arrived into what I will call my sovereign center.  I was totally at peace and in joy.  And, I emanated my soul vibration, which is unconditional love and total acceptance, without attachment, to what is.  As I was Living That which I Am, if someone asked me for help, I could, without thought or question, simply turn on a dime and be that, to meet their need.  Meanwhile, people were coming out of the woodwork wanting to spend time with me, and sharing of themselves.  I had the ‘aha’ experience in the middle of one night:  it is by how we Be the change we are seeking in the world that we indeed effect that change, not what we say or how we think.  I had expressed to Sister Natacha that my soul simply could not grock the hierarchical initiatic cosmology which she perceives to be how the world runs.  Our heart connection was strong, hence no argument, no disconnect, no separation, just two worlds meeting one another without cognitive agreement.  That was all.

I suddenly realized that the shift the planet is in, the warp or ascension into the 5th level of consciousness will be happening in exactly that manner – by those of us who have – at least for moments – recognized the vibration, simply being it. I believe it is thus that we will resonate with one another in the world into which we are morphing.  The new beings coming into the planet now, know it, and have not forgotten.

We are the Hundreth Monkey phenomena in action.  This time is happening not just in a few islands in the South Pacific, it is a global happening.  Welcome aboard.  Be that which thou art in the Center of your soul’s Being.

Just before I left one of the brothers gave me some information, which I have barely begun to skim, but it gives a way to be in living practice of the 5th dimensional heart connectedness on the planet.  In case you are interested, here is the URL: http://wingmakers.com/philosophy.html

Also, I happen to love Sufi stories.  The story of Mojud has been my guiding light for the past four years.  When I first heard it, I knew that the level of Trust and Presence it describes was how life was meant to be lived.  You can find it on-line through google.   If you want Bhagwan Shree Rajneesh’s magnificent commentary on the story, you can still find copies occasionally on Amazon.com.

And this one too came to me.   Perhaps it is time for us all to drop our crutches.    ‘ Walk with a Crutch’:

A man once hurt his leg. He had to walk with a crutch.
This crutch was very useful to him, both for walking, and many other things.
He taught all his family to use crutches, and they became part of normal life.    It was part of everyone’s ambition to have a crutch. Some were made of ivory, others adorned with gold. Schools were opened to train people in their use, university chairs endowed to deal with the higher aspects of this science.
A few, a very few people, started to walk without crutches. This was considered scandalous, absurd. Besides, there were so many uses for crutches.
Some replied, and were punished. They tried to show that a crutch would be used sometimes, when needed; or that many of the other uses to which a crutch was put could be supplied in other ways.
Few listened.
In order to overcome the prejudices, some of the people who could walk without support began to behave in a totally different way from established society.
Still they remained few.
When it was found that, having used crutches for so many generations, few people could in fact walk without crutches, the majority `proved’ that they were necessary. `Here,’ they said, `here is a man — try to make him walk without a crutch. See? — He cannot!’
`But we are walking without crutches,’ the ordinary walkers reminded them.
`This is not true; merely a fancy of your own,’ said the cripples, because by that time they were becoming blind as well — blind because they would not see.

After I left IDEAL, I spent a couple of days with a soul-brother of mine, the founder and creator of www.mandalahomes.com.  What a treat.  He designs and builds pre-fab round houses of very high quality.  Here is a man who is truly living his life to consciously serve, harvesting trees in an ethical manner, using green building materials, and creating works of art in which one can live into one’s life.  We had been corresponding for some time. This was the first time we had the privilege of meeting in person.  If you have an inclination to build round and wood is your building material of choice, I cannot recommend the sweetness and soundness and beauty of his homes enough.  By the way, Mandala Custom Homes is in Nelson, BC, known for the following three ‘mosts’:  most artists in North America; most millionaires, and most soccer players.  Nelson has had a steady population since the 70’s.

The entire part of at least south-eastern BC is the most graphic expression of glacier footprints I have ever experienced:  Long, very long scoured deep valleys, headed SW in direction, often with Very Long lakes at the bottom of them.  The Okanagan  Valley has two such long lakes going from Vernon, BC in the north to Penticton in the south.  It is also way warmer than where I was near Jaffray, BC, fruit and grapes everywhere – really very magical.  Had two lovely visits with old friends, one from Kingston, Ontario, the other from Toronto.

Back in the States now, the next chapter begins as I go en route to my nephew’s wedding.

Be well, my friend, inside and out.  Enjoy that juicy place in your heart.   Enjoy connecting with the juicy places in other people’s hearts.  Everyone is doing the best they know how.  Let our light shine.

The following arrived in my in box the other day.  I grew up seeing the iconoclastic e e cummings at the local grocery store in Silver Lake, NH.  How forward thinking he was:

love is a place
& through this place of
love move
(with brightness of peace)
all places

yes is a world
& in this world of
yes live
(skillfully curled)
all worlds

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Perturbation

Heart Songs, Note # 23, Perturbation, Aug 4, 2010

Greetings from the Road, my Friends;

I’ve just fallen in love.

I wanted you to be the first to know.

Pause!  Breathe.  Rest into your breath for a moment, please….

Now, tell me, I’m curious, what leaps of fantasy has your mind already made?  Yes, I know you are my support team, and I know you are holding me and my highest good in your hearts and prayers.  I thank you for this care and generosity….  It means a lot to me.

FYI, no, my mate has not yet shown up, although I am certain he is close by…

In the Beginning was the Word:

For the moment, it is ‘just’ a word with which I have fallen in love.  The word is Perturbation.  Of course, as a Harvard graduate and a PhD! I must know this word.  However, it has just unveiled itself to me in all its true magnificence.  I’d like to share some of this magnificence with you.   Perturbation is the keystone to our current evolution on this planet.  Perturbation is the heyoka of the New Age – it is persistent and sneaks up on you when you least expect it.

Oh and much to my great joy, I am re-gathering a menagerie.   Not quite what I had before the fire, but enough to nourish me.  As well as my pup Mojud, and my kombucha mushroom, I was now just gifted a pet kefir colony.  My new bundle of kefir bacteria perturbs my milk daily, rendering me the most wonderful fresh, sweet, health-giving kefir!

And did you know that you can perturbate my body’s chemistry to secrete oxytosin, the chemical of bonding, just by looking deeply into my eyes with love?  That’s perturbation at it’s tenderest.

[Hear laughter stage left]:  I can just hear the peanut gallery,  “We were concerned about her before, now we’re afraid she’s really lost it.”  If that is your song, I’d recommend you dump this email before you read any further – there could just be some perturbation (translate ‘mischief’ here) in it for you.

Perturbation, ground zero definition:

Of course I’ve known what it means to be perturbed:   ‘upset, confused, disoriented’, all with a ‘negative’ twist thrown into the mix.   My in-love-ness is my discovery that there is something oh so juicy about the process of perturbation, the process of making it conscious, that is ecstatic and nigh irresistible.  True perturbation can only best happen in a unified field of consciousness – viz the meeting of Rumi and Shams y Tabriz.  It helps to have good clay!

When we emanate a coherent energy field, we entrain others around us into that coherence – as a Trager practitioner, like myself, in Hook-Up; like a yogi in Samadhi – a sweet perturbation that can be life-transforming.

Perturbation is part of the birthing process as we gradually awaken in the classroom called planet earth.  It happens repeatedly in smaller, and sometimes larger packages.  [Psst, FYI:  our mind’s job description is to do everything it can to close down and to resist the invitation perturbation offers us daily!].

At its very best perturbation disrupts incoherence in such a manner as to entrain and transform it into a coherent field.  This is very exciting.  It is this coherence that we are in the process of manifesting as we proceed towards the next stage of evolution on earth.  It will come through comm-unity working together for the greater good of the whole – the opposite of what our governments have been doing for the past 2000 plus years.

Perturbation has the following linguistic roots:  from Latin perturbre : per-, per- + turbre, to throw into disorder (from turba, confusion, perhaps from Greek turb).]

Perturbation has some really fancy meanings in chaos theory and quantum physics.  I won’t cite those here.  The one in biology is easier to grasp, from Wikipedia:

“A perturbation of a biological system is an alteration of function, induced by external or internal mechanisms. Biological systems can be perturbed through a number of means. Examples include:

•  Environmental stimuli (temperature changes, osmotic shock, pressure changes)

•  Small molecules that affect different biological pathways (drugs, toxins)

•  Manipulation of gene function, such as gene knockout or transcript knockdown by RNA interference

•  Motor movements when they encounter external disruptions, such a leg stepping into a hole”

My intention in the writings below is to evolve to an even more elegant, all-encompassing, and beautiful definition of the word perturbation.  Remember, the lotus flower, which stands radiant and beautiful four feet above the water, has its roots in the mud and muck.

Some stories from my life:

Pregnancy, labor, birthing, and personality.

I have two exquisitely beautiful daughters, each full and beautiful in her own unique way, inside and out.  There is one (I am sure there are many more) outstanding difference between them:  both in how long it took each of them to execute the birthing process, which seemingly correlates to a very high degree to how long it takes them to make decisions in their lives.  The older seems to experience long periods of perturbation in her decision-making process; the younger seemingly turns on a dime.  They each have strong and deep commitment to their decisions, once they are taken.  They do not waver in this.

With my first daughter, I got the news of my mother’s passing, five hours later my waters broke, and 256 hours after that my daughter emerged into the world – with and Apgar of 9!  Now my body leapt into labor, all went swimmingly quickly to 8 centimeters dilation…  and then just hung there in this almost-ready-to-birth place for hours and hours and hours.  We finally needed pytosin and an entire team of doctors including her dad to welcome her.  The contractions with the pytosin felt like entire apartment buildings were falling together with my body between them.  They were horrendous.   That’s one kind of perturbation.

The labor with my second daughter on the other hand, was door-to-door 2 ½ hours.  Each of the crowing contractions were ecstatic and can best be compared to full body orgasms, in other words, easy and delight-full, life-giving.   Oh, God, you can perturbate me that way any old time!

Here’s an observation, another gift from my daughters.

After my divorce, when the girls were four and seven, and for many years thereafter I noticed the following.  My ex and I had a co-parenting agreement.  The kids would go back and forth between my home and his home.  No matter the length of their stay with me, whether it was several days, a week, a month or more, the same pattern emerged.  It would take them about 1/3 of the time to “get” there, then for about 1/3 of the time they were really “there”, and then about 1/3 of the time was spent in preparation for the move to their dad’s.  So, 2/3’s of their young lives was spent in Perturbation time, while only 1/3 was spent in Being time.

I remember one of them asking me:  “Mommy, why do we have to be so different at your house than at dad’s?”   [This was not an easy divorce and communication was not good between him and me nor between me and him].  I remember responding:  “That is why we are not living together.  You will take the best from each household from which to create your lives when you grow up.” – and bless their hearts, they have!

In 1993-4 I spent ten months in Israel.

What an incredible gift; what a beautiful open-hearted, welcoming and up-front honest people.  It was there that I first began to consciously witness my own perturbation / birthing-of-the-new process.  During those ten months I had three wonderful hostesses.  With each of them, after months of grace-filled time together, I would experience a time or perturbation that would last from a week to ten days, time in which I knew I must move on, but had not yet figured out how to do so or where to go.  I would feel low-grade agitated, uncomfortable inside my skin, awkward, more separate and different than I had at any time prior in our visit, antsy, and to a certain degree “stuck” and unable to move.  It was like there was a battle going on inside of me.  “To Be or not to Be”:  the old was done, but the new had not yet birthed itself, this is perturbation in process.

Functional Spiritual Perturbation:

Interestingly, I have been experiencing exactly the same quality of angst/tension, in much smaller does and for much shorter durations, just before each new shift on this current road journey.

Much has fallen away from me since my house burned Thanksgiving week ’09.  I almost take it for granted that more will fall away.  My home and my belongings (except my viola, as I was playing a concert about the birth of Christ) all went Nov 21, ’09.   Feb 21, ’10 I received an email from my local Sangha telling me I could no longer lead Dances of Universal Peace with them – something I had been doing for the previous five years.  The first loss was hard, but it was just ‘stuff’, stuff that anchored me, but stuff nonetheless.  The second cut to the core of my being.  What I had thought to be spiritual family had deserted me.  I did not understand from whence this desertion came, and no communication was granted.  This isolation rendered the grieving yet deeper and at once harder to process.

Looked at in perspective, my entire current life is one massive perturbation – the fire erased 68 years of manifest history, the next piece of my life journey is still in process of being birthed, the details of which have not yet been unveiled.  The voice of the ego by job-description is often in ‘hold-back’ mode; that of my Spirit is ready to soar.

I was very aware that something was going on, when just before coming to the PanEuRhythmy workshop in early July in Victor, Montana, I had to pull over to ‘meditate’, even though that was likely to make me late for my first dinner with the PanEuRhythmy folk.  Well, in a very busy highway parking lot I went out cold for at least an hour.  I was aware at the time that this was my soul’s preparation for the perturbation awaiting me there.   There has been a pause required at each new shift on this journey, a breathing into the next perturbation.

Perturbation is an offering from Spirit.

Perturbation is an offering to support us on our journey of personal and soul evolution on planet earth.  Perturbation comes in all sorts of packages – usually perfectly exquisitely designed to catch and grab onto the part of our ego that is most in need of (and most resistant to) opening to new possibilities.  How we respond determines the degree to which, the depth and the speed at which, we get to digest (incorporate, integrate) that particular perturbation.  The more we resist, the more difficult and the harder the journey, or as Pir Vilayat comments:  ‘no spiritual growth takes place when one is holding a grudge’ – and what is resistance, but a grudge against ourselves, or someone, or the process, or whatever….  Resistance is a desperate death cry of the ego to hold onto what it believes is safe and firm ground upon which to stand – ie what you thought your life and world were about.

Perturbation:  My week at Wilderness Dance of Universal Peace Camp, Rollins, MT, end of July, ‘10.

I just got a beautiful lesson in the fullness and beauty of spiritual perturbation, a story that is humbling to share, but I believe worth sharing – if only that you do not have to walk as many steps as did I, and also so you can recognize the territory when it arises and surrender to the gifts that it enfolds.

In this week at dance camp, the perturbation process became strikingly clear to me.  There was a stimulus (there always is, although when the stimulus comes only from inside it may not be as visible).  Two days before camp was to start, I received an email that perturbed my inner sense of flow and equilibrium.  I need to be more accurate in that articulation.  Really, nothing from outside can really affect one.  It is one’s own inner response that determines the degree and quality of perturbation one experiences.  At the most gross level there is always the choice between Victim and Gratitude, between Fear and Hope.

Well, I had resistance to the information I received in that email, and it was my resistance to that information that created several days of uncomfortable perturbation for me.  By the way, the story-line, who’s right and who’s wrong is really irrelevant.  What is relevant in how you are able to use the perturbation of the stimulus, is how you respond.  In the process of focalizing my resistance (ego-survival), I successfully dissolved the joyous equilibrium that had been my status quo.  I consequently began the process of coming apart at the seams.  I had allowed someone else’s words to throw me into inner turmoil.

What were the symptoms of my resistance to this perturbation?

•  I could not sleep at night (and as I became more aware, I realized that similar perturbations were happening in many of my fellow campers, each for their own unique reasons, but with the similar symptom:  interrupted or lost sleep, often accompanied by anxiety or nightmares.  This lasted for the first several days at camp.  Sleep was not only interrupted and lost, but angst claimed me in the middle of the night, which has not happened for some time.  Did I take this as a clue that something ‘big’ was afoot?   No, I just closed down more in resistance to my own close-down.  I was still harboring the belief that cause resided outside of me.  Unless we are very conscious, such close-down is, by the way, very ‘normal’ behavior.  Feeling separate and alien is a dance we humans seem to do on our way to unity consciousness.

•  My breathing seemed to slow and become more shallow – I was allowing less prana, less life force into my body.

•  My chest, heart center, felt as if there were a vice on it – my body had become identified with the hurt and outrage I was feeling.

• I became hypersensitive, paranoid would be an exaggeration, but certainly describes the flavor of this hyper-alert-sensitiveness that I was exploring.

•  At the same time, I could feel myself isolating myself, feeling separate, uneasy, not belonging, different – and finally, alien… to both myself and to those around me, and in particular, oh so tight around the person who had sent the stimulus email just prior to my arriving at camp.

By the end of the second sleepless night I was in such close-down pain that I was ready – still believing it was ‘out there’ (a good trick of the ego) – to leave camp, or,….  to walk through.  I decided on the latter.  I was no longer willing to continue the drama of shut-down that was happening in my body/mind.

So I sent this person the following email, knowing that my choice here is what mattered and whether I heard back or not, or he did what I asked or not, was of little relevance:

Woke up this morning with the following — an experiment…

I will endeavor to live the practice:  see you as the Beloved in all your radiant beauty.

I’m wondering if you would be willing to live the practice and see me as the Beloved in all my radiant beauty?

Certainly a beauty alternative to the kakimunkus polarizations we have somehow walked into.

Have a wonderful day, 🙂 M”

Interestingly, this opened a completely new door in my process of perturbation.  This time I owned it as mine alone and not objectified in the ‘other’.  The process of coming apart at the seams continued.  I continued to dissolve.

The day I sent the above email, I stopped being able to hear the notes on my viola.

I love the Schema Israel, and have played it many times, in fact it was the first tune I was allowed to hear when I was first beginning to play by ear some 5-6 years ago.  The sound that comes through my viola for that song has been transformative for some members of the circle.  I went to get my viola in order to play for the dance – only to find:  I   could   not   hear   the   notes,  I simply could   not   find   them.  This really scared me:  “Oh, God, how much more do I need to let go of, not this too, please, not my music?!?”.  This tone-deafness continued for two days.

On the fourth morning, I awoke with the sensation that my cells were dissolving, that form, as I knew it to be, was falling away from me.  Form and purpose for being are related.    Without purpose, what is the reason to continue in 3-D?, I wondered.  Now, don’t get me wrong, I was neither suicidal, nor depressed – I simply could no longer discern a meaning to be here in this classroom called planet earth.  My mind wanted meaning.  And, I felt totally alien from all that was around me – except possibly the water and the trees.  This is true, deep, perturbation.

The re-integration process was equally fascinating – and did come with some help from the outside.  Where the dissolution had taken the better part of a week, the re-integration happened in a matter of hours.  One person simply held the cranial bones of my head when I told him that I felt I was dissolving cell-by-cell, while he kept repeating, “Oh, that’s so beautiful, that’s so beautiful.”  The pressure on the cranial bones of my head was comforting, and imparted some sense of form; the words, although they made no cognitive sense to me at the time, were soothing.

Another friend, when I told him I was dissolving, just laughed and said:  “Congratulations, that’s wonderful!”.  This irritated what was left of my debilitated ego and gave it some form.

Then a very bright scientist started firing questions at me.  I decided to answer from the state of consciousness in which I found myself, rather than going into pretend or evading.  The very process of having to use my brain to climb inside his to see how to connect with him, gave me back my brain.   I got that, although what I was saying to him may have seemed as if it was coming from a very different planet (this is where his perturbation came in – since we are all One, we get to pass around our perturbation gifts), he was really listening and actually hearing what I was saying.

Later that day, I was playing in the center of the circle again, with a sense of ease and comfort and solidity.  I was hearing the notes quite well, and felt at peace for the first time since I had arrived at camp.

Illness too is a perturbation, a wake-up call.

I saw a client recently who has been very ill and weakened by pneumonia and concomitant liver failure over the past six months.  She articulated it beautifully:  not only did she feel physically weakened, but she had lost the emotional stamina that allowed her to feel and sustain a state of being vulnerable.  It takes energy to rise with the gift of perturbation – a lot of energy.  She has been watching flickering images almost constantly during this time of healing, particularly a bunch of old videos that she watches time and again.  She was using the flickering images as medicine, medicine to occupy her monkey mind so that she would not feel the fear (flashbacks from a horrendous childhood), and she could keep at bay memories that were perturbating themselves into her consciousness.  She knows there is freedom and aliveness there to live – and she has the wisdom to know that the time is not yet, that she does not have the emotional of physical resilience yet to walk it through.  She is very aware that the terror is the gate-keeper of the at the threshold of her future Aliveness.  We all walk our perturbations in our own time – actually, in God’s.

What a lovely teacher she was to me in that session.  Thank you.  [BTW:  Everyone is our teacher, if we only welcome them as such!]:  our egos so want us to look good to the outside, to hurry us past the deep opportunities for healing that the big perturbations of life offer us.  I too have that voice:  “Why don’t I yet know who I will be when I grow up?” – post fire.

I wonder:  how is it that as a culture we are so addicted to living a ½ life, to making ‘nice”, to keeping the perturbations at bay?

It is interesting to note that at the moment one is living any experience there is absolutely no fear, no emotion, no matter how awe-full that experience may be.  It is in the moment the mind steps in to witness or judge or assess what is happening, that fear (resistance, hurt, anger, you name it) is birthed.

We are in a time of great change on the planet.

There has been and will be much more perturbation.  How are you walking the perturbations in your life?  Is it your ego or your soul that is in the driver’s seat?  Do you ride the horse of FEAR, or the one of TRUST?    Or is perhaps the Ostrich your totem in these days where it can All sometimes simply feel like Too Much?

There are perturbations we simply cannot allow into our consciousness in their fullness at the time they come to us.  I have noted that I have a certain ‘deafness’ when it comes to hearing that a beloved is about to leave their body.  I remember my mother writing me a letter a month or so before she died telling me she was an “old lady” – her way of telling me she was dying.  Well, she was 57, my grandma died at 95, my mind could not hear her, would not hear her.  Twice later, others have told me they were dying, and again, I did not hear them.  With one, a soul buddy, my body told me.  As I drove away from our last visit, I burst into hours of uncontrollable sobbing, crying out to God that in our next lives together we would be inseparable.

How have the perturbations of your life brought you closer to God, to wholeness, to Love?  What are the gifts of these perturbations for you?   And, if there were perturbations that at the time you received as negative or ‘bad’, is there a way you can revisit them now and reframe so you can use them as life-giving rather than life-taking?  All IS a gift from the Divine.  What are the perturbations to which you lend a deaf ear?

No matter what “story” you ascribe to be the causative factors underlying the events of 9/11 when the planes ran into the towers in NYC, the perturbation sparked on that day is still unfolding at a cellular level world-wide today.  No matter your understanding of the ‘right’ or ‘wrong’ of our wars in Afghanistan and Iraq, they are perturbating your world – as is the depleted uranium released there, now world-wide in all the air we breathe.  There are many more perturbations that at some level are touching each one of us, and of course more intensely at ground zero.

The tsunami of several years ago in SE Asia was the first ‘Big’ ‘Natural’ perturbation, calling us to attention; then came the large earthquake in China.  More recently, just this year, we have had two large earthquakes, in Chile and in Haiti, a massive volcanic eruption in Iceland that dusted most of Europe, and now an ongoing oil disaster in the Gulf of Mexico.  That’s just this year, and the year is barely 8 months old.

We are shifting from a world where close-down was the trigger response, to one in which walking through and using the energy to open our hearts to the connectedness of all life and how we may serve it is the only clear option.

Perturbation, operational definition for the Times we are in:

Perturbation is that which can catalyze change, not arithmetically, not geometrically, but something akin to logarithmic change or greater than that.

•  Perturbation is a life-giving, life-enhancing opportunity for transformation and transcendence.

•  Perturbation is designed to disrupt the status quo, to open your heart and Spirit.

•  How much Perturbation can you stand?

•  How much LOVE can you allow into your life, can you Live in your live?

•  How much of the Creator can you fit into this 3-D physical manifestation?

The clearer, more congruent, more heart-centered you are, and I am, the more we are contributing to a unified field of peace on earth for all peoples.  It is with this perturbation of unconditional loving presence that we get live into the next world.  Thank you for being a part of this new wave of consciousness.

Enchanted

By Rasakhan (1534? – 1619?)

English version by Shyamdas

I put my fingers in my ears

to block the sound

whenever Krishna gently plays His flute!

Declares Raskhan,

“It happens when enchanter Mohan

climbs to the rooftop

to call His cows.

“I issue a warning to all the people of Braja.

Tomorrow, I will not be able to console them.

“O, friend!

Having glimpsed His smile,

I cannot…

I cannot…

I will not

control my love.”

O – O – O – O – OM,

O – O – O – O – OM,

SHANTI PRA SHANTI,

O – O – O – O – OM.

Book Gift: Carla Hannaford:  Playing in the Unified Field, Raising and Becoming Conscious, Creative Human Beings. Disclaimer:  I wrote all of the above before reading her book. Acknowledgment: it was Jamilla Nur, Carla’s Sufi name, that dropped the word perturbation into my consciousness at dance camp last week.  Thank you Jamilla Nur for the inspiration.

Contact information for Marianna Hartsong remains the same:

Phone:  928-300-3963

Email: well at hartsong dot net

Mailing Address:  PO Box 4394, Sedona, AZ, 86340.

If you wish to mail to me directly for the month of August send to me, care of:

I.D.E.A.L. Society Box 280 , Jaffray, B.C. VOB 1T0 Canada

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Notes from the Road: July 21, 2010

July 21, 2010  Notes from the road

As I was driving today and appreciating the vast open spaces that were opening in front of me in N Wyoming and S Central Montana I felt an urgency to write to you all.   You see there is an advantage to being one of the very slowest vehicles on the road – no-one to block my view (though in inverse I hate to think what my Sunrader does to others’ views in a no-pass zone).  There is Peace and Beauty in the wide open spaces.

It is good to travel.  Staying in one place increases one’s myopia.  For about 8 years now I have been bewailing the fate of the ponderosa pines in Arizona. Combined with our drought in Arizona, the pines have been succumbing to the Pine Bark Beetle – entire forests are but reddened skeletons of their once vibrant green selves.   My myopia is that I thought this was an Arizona phenomenon.  Much to my deep sadness, I find that the same pine bark beetle ravage is happening in Colorado, in Wyoming (where there are trees!) and in Montana:  perfect tinder for massive forest fires.  And it has been hot, and dry.

When I sat down to write I realized that today is the 8-month anniversary of my house fire.  Time is so illusory.  Eight months is but a blink of an eye (remember from the Messiah:  “In a twinkling of an eye your life shall be changed”).   Seemingly  at present I am suspended between ‘Then’ and ‘When’, creating the illusion of time expanding exponentially.

I am not a newcomer to taking to the road – in ’83-84 I spent nine months in the far East and India, Nepal and Sri Lanka with a back-pack on my back.  In the Spring of ’95, following “Orders”, I went West – ‘open to the possibility that Home might be there’ and landed in the Verde Valley of Arizona.  On both those extended journeys there were ‘anchors’ at home – and clear directives from on high.  On the first my kids and stuff awaited me, on the second, my kids having graduated it was just ‘stuff’ at $200./ month that was the promise of form for my next life.  These anchors seemed to keep Time in perspective.

The fire seems to have wiped the slate clean.  There are no familiar anchors awaiting my next landing place.  And the ‘Voice’ that has been so ever-present and in the past sometimes a veritable “Big Mouth’, has been mum.  This anchorlessness can be extremely unsettling; or, on a bright an timeless day, absolutely freeing.

Had an interesting dialogue with a friend over the phone the other day.  It is one of my favorite ways of being Present and in a Meditative space in the presence of a witnessing Other.  The practice arises from the Enlightment Intensive where fore days (up to 21 I believe) you ask and answer the question “Tell me Who You Are.”  In this form, each person comes to the phone call with a question in mind to have the other ask them.  The dialogue goes for four rounds of five minutes each for each person, a total of 40 minutes.  This is not a conversation, but an asking of the question, a listening to the response and a saying of “Thank You” and then asking the question again for the five-minute duration.  At five minutes the two people switch roles of questioner and answerer.

That day my question was:  “Tell me, how do you Live with Uncertainty?”  The first witnessing allowed me to realize that the ‘uncertainty’ (which I was Certain existed, resided as a sensation of tightening and contraction sensed as FEAR (False Expectations Appearing Real!) between by heart and my solar plexus.  The short version of allowing this question over four rounds to go deeper and deeper in me, is my discovery that uncertainty only exists in Time, only exists when one’s mind takes one out of the Present.  In true Now there exists only Peace, only Radiance.  If I sit in the driver’s seat as I did for four hours this morning simply drinking in the amazing beauty that was passing by my eyes at 50-60 miles per hour; or if I sit by a stream (one of my favorite stopping places), feeling the breeze on my skin, hearing the sound of the bubbling water, smelling the wondrous smells that come with a little humidity in the air, there is no uncertainty, there is no separation from Now, and consequently no need for ‘anchors’.

Passed a messy looking accident this morning, involving a vehicle somewhat like mine and an SUV.  The RV had literally exloded apart, its remains spread across the landscape; the SUV was battered and all discolored (having burned?).   I arrived too late to know if anyone had escaped alive.  Yes, “in an instant your life shall be changed, in the twinkling of an eye”.  I did some ChoKoRees and some Ho’oponopono, and breathed deeply in gratitude for this moment.

Wonderful magic comes from riding the Moment in Trust of exquisite unfoldment.  Out of seemingly nowhere a wonderful guitarist was offered to me to support my opening of the Trager conference with Dances of Universal Peace as I had been asked to do.  “From You I receive to You I give, together we share and from this we live.”  He invited me to his evening of Zikr in Boulder following the closing of the conference.  I arrived, and not only did he say, “Put your case aside, just plan to play the entire evening” – what Bliss.  But arriving with the Intention that I should find someone there who had a massage table I might borrow to give a young friend a session the following morning – the very first conversation, provided not only a massage table, but a key to an office in which to do the massage – and an invite to another DUP dance the following day.  When we got to the office, there was a balcony, totally private, so we could do the treatment outside in the fresh mountain air – perfect beyond any possible expectations I may have had!  How grace-filled is that?  And today, having called to all sorts of RV places ahead en route to get my AC fixed – the shortest route was, of course, via a Hot Springs.  That’s as close to Heaven as it gets.

For some 3-D catch-up:  Came from a PanEuRhythmy Dance came in Victor Montana, to the Trager Conference near Denver, CO, Heading toward Wilderness Dance Camp on Flathead Lake, via a Trager client in Bigfork.  Then going on to Glacier National Park and the IDEAL (Institute for the Development of Education, Art and Leisure) in Jaffary, BC.

And in case you did not figure it out, questions like:  “When are you planning to rebuild?” are not even on the map of my consciousness at present.  There is something much bigger in store for me.  What that is?  Well, that is a good question.

A quote from the office wall the summer I co-led Canada’s Outward Bound courses in Northern Ontario comes to mind:

The Journey

Where are you going, I asked

— to places I have never been, was the answer

What to you plan to do, I asked

— my purpose will be evident at the journey’s end

Who has planned your itinerary

–its plan will be revealed at times most unlikely

Why would you consent to such a vague plan

–I accepted the challenge when I accepted Life,

was the answer.

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Ruach, 6-20-10

6-20-10,  RUACH:

This morning I awaken humming the tune to Ruach.  Ruach means peace, but its root comes from the word for Breath – Spirit.  It also contains a Nigun.  A Nigun is sung to a series of syllables, in this case, Lai, lai, la lai lai, la lai, lai, la lai, lai, … .  Niguns evolved when the Jews were being persecuted and not allowed to worship and pray in their language.  The ‘nonesense’ syllables of the Nigun stood for prayers which they knew in the silence of their hearts – so pray they could anyways.  Prayer is a good thing.

This morning’s tune made me think of the wonderful book of Theodore Reik, one of the many precious book people that I burned, The Haunting Melody.   His basic premise is that all melodies come to us with a message.  Ruach, what a blessing on this day.

To wake up with Ruach [I mean I did not think it, or choose it], I know I am totally held, totally taken care of.  I also know it has been given to me now to bring to the Trager Conference in mid July which I have been asked to open with Dances of Universal Peace.  Ruach is like the ‘Hook-Up’ that Milton Trager gave to us, the deeply meditational place of connectedness with All-that-is from which to share his work with another.  How perfect.

This morning’s walking, singing, opening, spiral meditation took me down along a cow path;  my spot of meditation, given to me when the spiral is fully opened, this day is a dry creek bottom.  Although dry, the marks of the flow of water are oh so clear:  branches bent downwards, leaves and twigs collected in bundles where the water left them, gullies between the rocks where the water once flowed…

Such an honor it is to have this time:  “Speak no evil, do no harm.”  Why this rush in the Western world to Do, Do, Do.  Am I not contributing to the well-being of the earth just by being the vibration of Ruach this morning?  Is that not enough?  We create so much pain in our worlds by feeling we have failed at all we need to ‘Do’ – or in ‘Doing’ – as currently in the humungous oil spill in the Gulf of Mexico – perpetrating harm in our Doing.

In gratitude, I am open to my day of Being.

Half and hour later, back at camp:

Keenly aware as I left my morning meditation spot in the gully that this morning I had neglected to bring my cell phone with me.  In my 70th year, when bushwhacking through scrub oak at 8000 feet, I consider it prudent to have that life-line with me.

How much more attention I paid on this morning’s return.  Scrub oak is gnarly, short, tough, intertwined – can be a way harsh bush-whack, especially in shorts.  So I follow the cow, deer, elk trails.  Very clear to me as I meander this way and that along the trails, that they do not navigate with a Western linear mind!  Find myself remembering the angles at which the morning shadows of the trees had papered the ground of my camp site – for that, mid the seemingly random meanderings of the animals paths, is my compass.  I listen for the sounds of the dirt road above me – but as vehicles are infrequent this is of little use.  I know that somewhere to the right of me runs a gas line, and that some distance to the left of me runs an electric line – other arms of the compass.

I realize how this phone-less meander has honed all my senses, and reawakened my deep inner knowing of how to navigate.

How orphaned are we in our modern world – our paths are prescribed, we have no need to hone these navigational skills.  No wonder we get lost.

Pure delight when I emerged on the road:  directly opposite where my RV, ‘Ms Freedom’, is parked.

This is a journey of re-member-ing, putting myself back together – deeply.

Had I started building in March as I had planned – until I was stopped dead in my tracks – I would have built from a place of my forgotten knowing.  Now, if ever I choose to build, it will be from a place of deep Knowing, deep navigational remembering skills.

Pooping in the woods is joyously satisfying.  First, being certain you are at lest 200 feet from any water way,  you find a large stone and over-turn it, creating a great poop hole.  Then the squat puts the sigmoid colon in just the right orientation to Let Go.  Poop and paper after concealed by the replaced rock.  The soil microorganisms will complete the job, returning “earth to earth and dust to dust”.  The cows are not so considerate!

All this, and I have not yet breakfasted.  Right now I am break-fasting on the sound of the wind in the pine tops:  Ruach.  Then the four-wheelers come rumbling by, shiny black, pink, bright blue and red.  Exhaust is now heavy in this pristine air…   And then again, the Silence returns, the Ruach of the pines dancing with the morning breeze.

I have given myself a book-person companion for daily reading on this journey:  Earth Medicine, Ancestors’ Ways of Harmony for Many Moons by Jamie Sams.  The book follows the rhythm of the moon cycles with simple, beautiful, deep and sometimes humorous daily teachings.  This morning’s reading:  Currents of the River, p. 156, spoke deeply to me.  I am a river of life, flowing.  I just came off five days on the Green River in May, and am hoping for a day on the Colorado near Grand Junction next week.  I share Jamie Sams poem with you:

“The currents of the river
Take me ‘round each bend,
Over white-water rapids,
Until I begin to blend
With the Water Spirits.
As we journey on our way,
Past the shores of memories,
The sun dawns on today.
The flow of life engulfs me,
My passage, the river’s sounds,
The currents take me safely,
‘Til I stand on sacred ground.
The songs of the river
Still ring within my soul,
Asking me to sing with them,
As I stand upon the shoal.
“Allow all those around you
To follow their own trails,
Finding their uniquenesses,
And telling their own tales.
Every current is different,
Every lesson will unfold,
And the flow of each river,
Brings blessings to the soul.”

And finally, I share a poem written to / for me last week by my friend Cyndy Hodo:

There are flowers that bloom

Only after the soil has been disturbed.

You see them along roadways,

After new construction

Or blooming among blackened trees

After wildfire has swept thru,

Seeds that have been waiting a long time.

Some of us are like that too,

Resting in seed form

Until disturbance wakes us,

And then for some reason,

Amidst the chaos, we bloom.

May God bless you in your travels Marianna.   Love, Cyndy

And blessings on this pre-summer Solstice morn to all of you whose navigational compass brings you to this page.  Peace and ease and much love on your journey.

As I learn the navigational skills required by this site, I will make it more beautiful.

Until then, simply know that all writings are copyrighted.  You may forward the link to it generously to your all friends whose heart and spirit you think it will touch:  http://www.hartsong.net

I look forward to receiving your emails at:  well ‘at’ hartsong ‘dot’ net.

Bless Your Heart and go in Peace, your friend,  J Marianna

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Morning Message 6-17-10

The first morning message from Spirit: 6-17-10

“Time to Listen

Time to Empty

Time to Be

Time to Give, generously, of who You Are, lovingly instigating beneficial changes in others….

Time to Replenish

Time to Receive

Time to Allow

Time to Accept, Witness, Be:

Alive in Heart and Spirit.”

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New Blog

Hi there all, I have a new toy. Speak to you soon from the road.  🙂 Marianna

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